Been awhile, but I haven't disappeared - though there have been many times I wish I could.
There's a lot happening but it's happening so fast that I am exhausted...breathless... like a carnival ride that is spinning and doesn't stop spinning, just gets faster and doesn't stop.
The reigns in my life seem to have disappeared and here I am, at the mercy of ....whatever or whoever.
The wind is knocked out of me.
God I don't want to be alone, yet I am afraid of being alone. Or,at least, being abandoned.
The conundrum is a desperate, deep, painful churn in my stomach that I hide.
This journey is more than I could ever imagined it to be. Wrought with self-awareness and reflection; patterns; mistakes...
This blog - this particular one - I write for a friend who called me today in tears. I felt her pain.
Hang in there.
