Tenderness Kills

Sitting rigidly, surrounded by Zen
my heart pounding, silently lashing myself
Idiot! Fool! Stupid!
I felt the weight of her next to me
as she slowly sat down.
I stared ahead, my legs outstretched
Stiff as the legs of a chair
Lashing, Lashing in my mind.
Cowering inside from my own hatred
I felt her hand - warm and soft -
lift mine, supine, in her own.
She said nothing for a moment,
just gently held my wounded arm
I heard her sigh a light sigh
Stupid! Idiot!
I felt her other hand reach up
gently squeeze my shoulder
"I'm sorry you're in so much pain,"
she said softly.

Don't be kind to me!
Don't be kind to me!
I was screaming inside.
Don't be kind to me!

Tenderness kills. It always has.
Don't touch me tenderly
Don't love me.
Don't be nice to me!

Tenderness Kills.
Tendernesss weakens.
Brings tears. Brings fears.
Puts your belly up
For everyone to punch.

Tenderness kills.

Don't touch me there....

Don't make me cry.